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pastorway

And He Himself gave some to be....evangelists, and some pastors and teachers, for the equipping of the saints for the work of ministry, for the edifying of the body of Christ...
- Ephesians 4:11-12

THIS BLOG HAS MOVED TO www.timeintheword.org

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Location: The Hill Country of Texas

Pastor - Providence Reformed Baptist Church
Director - TIME in the Word Ministries

Saturday, November 04, 2006

Phillip's Phunnies - Bulletin Bloopers

A merry heart does good, like medicine... - Proverbs 17:22

Bloopers: I don't think they meant what they said or said what they meant.

A new loudspeaker system has been installed in the church. It was given by one of our members in memory of his wife.

The church dinner was like Heaven. Many we expected to see were absent.

Members of the senior class are not to pass out until the pastor finishes preaching.

Tonight Pastor Hodges will begin a 6-part series on the Book of Genesis. Were Adam and Eve really naked in the Garden? Come see for yourself.

Last Monday night, the prayer group met at the home of Madge Tessler, who is no longer able to attend Church. What a blessing!

The service theme is: ‘Why Doesn’t God Do Something?’ with Pastor Meidinger.

The Senior Saints Choir has been disbanded for the summer with the thanks of the entire church.

In honor of Mrs. Jones financial donation to the Choir & Music department… in lieu of her late husband, Mr. Bernard Jones, Mrs. Jones was allowed to pick 3 hims for the evening service.

The choir will be sinning at tonight’s service

Mrs. Johnson and Mrs. Smith will assist with the mailing of the newsletter and stapling of the Annual Report to church members.

During the Pastor’s absence this weekend, the church secretary will give a massage to the congregation.

The message tonight by Pastor will be in Matthew 3 where Jesus came from Nazareth in Galilee and was baptized by Jordan in the John.

The newly formed Men’s Choir will sing for the first time at tonight’s service and a real threat is anticipated.

Beginning with next Sunday’s service, the ushers will eat all the latecomers.

The May meeting of the church finance committee will be hell as usual.

Today’s Sermon: How Much Can A Man Drink, with hymns from a full choir.

Notice to all men attending the Father’s Day Banquet: A sports jacket may be worn to the dinner – but no trousers.

We are glad to report that Mrs. Stevens who was accidentally hit in the head by her husband is said to be greatly improved.

During the Senior Saints trip to New York last week to visit Wall Street, Mrs. Agnes Wilson was hit by a car as she crossed the street. She was hit in the business section and is now recovering in the hospital.

Sunday School Banquet: Attend and you will hear an excellent speaker and heave a healthy lunch.

Church Picnic: The church will host an evening of good food, superb entertainment, and gracious hostility.

Potluck supper Sunday at 5 p.m. Prayer and medication to follow.

The associate minister unveiled the church's new tithing campaign slogan last Sunday: I Upped My Pledge - Up Yours.

BONUS: Comics



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